Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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