i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize
