lets start a swedish sibling band together
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I'm like, not good at living.
Randomize
