goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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