I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
