i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
Randomize
