You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Randomize
