There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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