My nipple is on Facebook.
Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
Randomize
