I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize
