You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
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