Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
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