White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Michael Bay diarrhea
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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