if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Randomize