According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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