oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
Randomize