YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
