Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
