Dignity is for republicans.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
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