why im i the only drunk person in the library?
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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