I am spending my child support on dildos
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
