Michael Bay diarrhea
Sober January is a disaster.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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