Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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