her vagine was all disorganized.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Randomize
