K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
