I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I got inside last night via doggy door
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Randomize
