I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Randomize
