its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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