that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
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