just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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