everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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