What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize
