yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
Randomize
