Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
