Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Randomize
