Sponge bath it is.
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Randomize
