I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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