I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
me + whiskey = a bad person
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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