i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
