So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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