she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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