Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Randomize
