god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
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