so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Randomize