im drinking this country out of the recession.
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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