Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
When are your genitals available?
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize
