your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Randomize
