I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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