i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
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