Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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